


On a Frosted Path

by Marvelmarie



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: M/M, beware jaeyong is barely there
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-06
Updated: 2018-02-06
Packaged: 2019-03-14 12:47:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,296
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13590363
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Marvelmarie/pseuds/Marvelmarie
Summary: Winters come and go, yet the feelings stay





	On a Frosted Path

**Author's Note:**

> Wow it's already February! I'm from that batch of cookies that think February is better than never!

Jaehyun adored snow. If there was ever a need to choose between a snowy day and a day filled with soft warm breezes, strawberry scent in the air and mischievous rays of sunlight, he’d forget all those summer promises to keep himself in the magical winter wonderland. Nothing in his mind could compare to the captivating atmosphere of a snow day. He loved to entertain himself by producing fluffy white clouds of air in the cold weather, catching myriads of littlest snowflake creatures and lining them up on his palm, or making castles, cities and even mountains out of the fuzzy white mass on the ground.  


That day it snowed badly. The storm was strong, as if a huge army of clouds was slaughtered across the state of Connecticut, drowning its cities and villages in a snow avalanche.  


It has gotten dark really quickly. Jaehyun's mother was driving, but she could barely keep the car moving straight on the road, its headlights smudging the snowbanks with hysterical yellow brushes. His mother's steady control of the wheel did not stop the car from sliding on the ice, and Jaehyun had to grab the door handle to keep himself from smashing into the window. His mother put him in the back seat, scared for his safety, but now she seemed to regret it. She kept stealing glances at him and asking if he was alright, if he had hit his head, if he was feeling nauseous... He did feel nauseous but he would’ve never told his mother that. He just kept nodding and mumbling weak okays.  


The rough weather and his mother’s continuous distraction (and maybe even fate) made this whole situation happen: their car swiveled two times and slided off the road. His mother screamed, Jaehyun squeezed his eyes shut, digging his fingers into the material of the seat.  


Luckily the snow that first dragged them into this mess helped slow down the wheels and the car stopped moving completely, the front bumper buried in the white mass.  
“Jaehyun, are you okay?” he heard his mother call him and realized that he was still keeping his eyes shut. From the noise he guessed that she practically crawled from her seat to the back of the car and only then he felt her warm breath. She held his head, caressing his cheeks, and Jaehyun carefully lifted his eyelids.  


“Are you?” he hardly heard himself mumble. It felt as if his whole body was in a shock. Weak from the cold, stressed from the accident, he barely managed to work his tongue.  
His mother suddenly kissed his nose and turned away.  


“I’m okay, baby, I’m alright, you don’t need to worry about me!” she was laughing strangely, with tiny hiccups, and was wiping her face. “Look what I’ve gotten us into! So careless... Should’ve called your dad instead. Why do I always do such thoughtless things...”  


“Are you really okay?” he felt like he gained some strength from his mother’s kiss and interrupted her, needing to make sure she was okay too, his most precious person.  


She turned back, rubbing the underside of her eyes, her gaze tinted with worry. She looked like she was struggling to keep up the light-hearted façade.  


“Of course I’m okay. I’m your super hero, haven’t you told me so?” she finally smiled with the usual kindness shining in her eyes and a tint of mischievousness hiding in the corners of her lips.  


Jaehyun felt himself smile too, beguiled by her pretty face, and she immediately pinched his cheek, kissing it better right after.  


“Okay, a hero needs to work now to get us out of here”, she moved back to the front seat, graceful even in the little space there was in their tiny rented car. She turned on the radio, and a low baritone voice of the radio DJ introduced a new rendition of an old festive song. Jaehyun couldn’t catch the name of the singer (it sounded somehow difficult to his ears) or the song, but he was sure he has heard the music before - it sounded familiar.  


His mother revved the engine and the car moved backwards, the wheels turning and then stopping again. She repeated the action several times, frustration visibly building up in her. The car roared, but the wheels were turning in place, sliding over the snow. She hit the handle, starting to yell out a word and stopping immediately, throwing a furtive glance at her son. He made it look like he hadn’t noticed. It was easy. He was lightly nodding to the song, trying to decipher the lyrics. What are you doing on the New Year's eve? The voice charmingly sang. It’s New Year’s Eve soon, Jaehyun thought absent-mindedly. His mother started dialing a number on her phone, obviously fooled by his nonchalant demeanor, letting him enjoy the music. That was okay with Jaehyun, and he was soon distracted from her anyway.  


He turned his head to the window, his eyes following the way the wind was throwing the swarm of snowflakes around. Some of them were sticking to the glass of the car window as if trying to get inside, get warm. Ironically, the merciless heat would’ve immediately turned the snow creatures into water drops, so it was good they stayed outside. Jaehyun felt like he was melting himself, it was so hot and his head was aching. His mother said his fever was high, probably still rising. They would’ve never even left the house had he not stupidly gotten himself sick. He made his mother so worried she took the car and drove them right into the snowstorm.  


He lifted his hand and touched the glass. It was so pleasantly refreshing, with ice already forming figures on the glass surface. He leaned towards the door and pressed his forehead to the window, breathing out a sigh. He imagined a cloud of steam coming from his forehead and smiled, picturing a well-rounded cast-iron kettle he’d seen on some old photos from his granny.  


His mother was still talking on the phone and the music was playing, but the sounds seemed muted, as if coming from far, far away, somewhere beyond the curtain of the howling wind. Suddenly another melodious sound touched Jaehyun's ears. It was really frail, barely audible. A light tingling in the ears; a start of a waltz for snowflakes to dance to. Suddenly it hit him, and his eyes flew open at the realization that the music was coming from outside, right from the white clouds of snow, with nothing in sight besides the pure whiteness. Staring into it, Jaehyun noticed a handful of tiny dots gradually forming a shape, small and barely visible. It started to grow quickly, as if something or someone was coming out of a storm, drawing closer and closer to their car. Jaehyun couldn’t believe his eyes. Blurred edges of the blotch expanded and redefined themselves into a silhouette of a boy. He could clearly see him there, and at the same time had an urge to pinch himself to make sure he didn't fall asleep. Because what sane person would go out afoot in such a storm only wearing - what was it, a blue sweatshirt and a pair of cropped pants? Jaehyun stared at the figure, trying to soak in the image, to notice every little detail so that he could make sense of this stranger coming towards him in the snowy night. He was not afraid - he generally did not get scared easily, and was more likely to get excited over every little thing, be that a slimy bug or an old dusty book, or a new version of the breakfast his mother made him every morning that suddenly on a seemingly uneventful Friday included a ball of something mashed and green.  


That was definitely a person, Jaehuyn thought, though probably the most beautiful person he has laid his eyes on? Well, except for his mother, all right, no one could top her amazing smile that always reflected in the corners of her eyes; but this boy came pretty close. His wild white hair was shining in the snow as if sprinkled with a mix of silver glitter and shaved ice. The silver undertones in the hair were so bright you would be tempted to think it was made out of silver itself. That couldn’t be true because there were no people with silver hair. But on the other hand, it was strange for the boy to have white hair too - Jaehyun has only seen it on the grannies from their neighborhood, and that boy surely looked young. He was probably the same age as his friend Rachel’s brother who was often picking her up from school. Rachel said that her brother was very popular ‘among the ladies’ and that her mother often bragged about it, proud that he was so handsome. Rachel whispered one day in Jaehyun's ear that she found him more handsome than her brother. Jaehyun got itchy and flustered and didn’t know what to say at that time, but he could certainly share with her now that he has seen someone prettier than anyone he or Rachel knew.  


The boy got really close to their car and the only thing separating their noses was the ice-covered glass. Jaehyun only now noticed that he has practically stuck his face against the glass, trying to take in the vision in front of him. The boy looked around as if trying to understand the circumstances Jaehyun was in. His brows furrowed for a few seconds and then climbed up, implying sympathy. His eyes were snowy grey, something stormy showing in his gaze for a moment, but it cleared up when he spoke. ‘It’s gonna be alright, don’t worry’, Jaehyun read his lips as the boy joined his thumb and index finger in an okay sign. Strangely, Jaehyun felt very cosy and safe barricaded in a car among the vast soulless whiteness because this total stranger, this out-of-a-fairytale being shot him the warmest smile he’s ever received. He mentally scolded himself for having such betraying thought towards his mother’s lovely smile but he couldn’t resist it. He was just a child easily charmed by the snow, the holiday spirit and this cold magician alleviating his worries with a display of kindness, such a contrast to his icy visage.  


While Jaehyun sat there, overwhelmed, the boy moved back to put some distance between himself and the car. What for, mildly questioned Jaehyun, lulled into a strange state of assureness. The boy examined the car, as if estimating how deep was the pile of snow Jaehyun’s car was buried in. He then turned his gaze to the car window and smirked at Jaehyun, his eyes telling ‘now watch me’. In the next moment the snow around the car stilled for a second, snowflakes hovering in the air, showing off their pretty dresses in detail, flashing their crystals. The boy drew out a wooden stick - a wand? - and then waved it to the side. The wind, previously ambiguous in the direction of its raging fury, moved like a controlled beast, or a winter general following the precise command of a wooden wand. The wind collected all of the delicate snowflakes and turned them into an army of white soldiers trained for action.  


The boy tilted his head and his eyes burned like icy blue coals, snowflakes circling the wooden rod. Jaehyun could practically feel the energy collected there, raw, dangerous - the pure power of a snowstorm. But that boy seemed to be in full control of the power, easily holding it in with his pale, slender fingers, smirking confidently. He then pointed the wand towards their car; but Jaehyun somehow still remained completely calm. In mere minutes the boy succeeded in garnering his trust so fully that Jaehyun was sitting there in a daze, quietly expecting the impact from the collision to quake the car. The hit never came though. Their car was gently, almost lovingly lifted in the air a couple of inches and then carried away from the snowbank. Jaehyun could imagine that he was riding a cloud (at least he was sure that this was how traveling on a cloud would feel like), its fluffy edges caving in sometimes, making the car sway a little from side to side. He was holding the handle above the car door, looking out the window, his eyes not wavering from the sight of the barefooted boy in a blue sweatshirt. The boy was floating above the ground alongside their car and Jaehyun could see him in full height. How was he not freezing without shoes, Jaehyun worriedly thought, leaning towards the window again. His eyelids were getting heavier by the second, but he felt an obligation towards his winter rescuer not to fall asleep. He was eager to float on the cloud for all eternity, but the car slowed down and Jaehyun felt its wheels touch the ground. Jaehyun saw a soft smile curling the boy’s lips, growing brighter as he felt the corners of his own mouth lifting in response. Something tugged at his heart, making it miss a couple of beats. What was that, Jaehyun wondered, keeping his eyes on the boy. As if mirroring his mood the boy questioningly tilted his head to the side. Another symptom of a cold? But he never felt something like this before. Should he ask a doctor about it? The boy tilted his head the other way in the same silent wonder. Jaehyun slightly shook his head. If his mother hears it she will get extremely worried and won’t let him go outside for a week, and then how will he be able to meet this stranger again? Jaehyun drew his hand to the glass trying to reach the boy. The ice on the glass started melting and the vision of the boy was getting blurry behind the water droplets on a glass.  


“No, no”, anxiously whispered Jaehyun, his hot breath coming out in wisps. He was desperately wiping the glass, but the droplets continued spreading, destroying the outside visage even more. Out of the smeared picture a hand materialized against his own, ceasing his panicky movements and freezing the glass once again. Jaehyun freezed too, amazed by the sudden near contact, his eyes fixed on the hand, as if he became a meticulous scholar excited to memorize every detail of this new foreign object in his immediate view. It was a slightly bigger hand than his own, but very slim, very pale, with no hint of rose or pink in it, not even on the tips of the fingers. If Jaehyun was honest with himself - and he never ever lied (unless it was about eating a whole package of chocolate candies before dinner... but that was okay because it was not preventing him from dutifully consuming a full-course meal, making his mother proud) - the hand reminded him a bit of a pale popsicle. Otherwise how could he explain the fact that he kind of briefly, just for a little bit, had a sudden desire to lick it? Maybe he was simply hungry? Come to think on it, he has eaten practically nothing that day, which was the first reason for his mother to start worrying and questioning his health. With his attention still glued to the hand Jaehyun suddenly heard his mother’s voice. It took him half a second to send a look in her direction, but when he turned back to the window the hand disappeared. The boy moved further away, hovering in the air, raising his free hand up. He was waving. Was he saying goodbye? Jaehyun shivered. He didn't even notice how his hand that was still stuck to the glass started getting cold, slowly turning paler and losing its rose undertones. He felt the cold seep into it, travel through his arm and pinch his heart with an icy needle. Stinging goose bumps scattered over his skin and the frost swamped him for a second, chilling him to the bone - and then not a moment later it melted completely, drowsing Jaehyun into a pleasant feeling. It was the same feeling as the one you get coming home after a huge snow fight, your mother giving you hot cocoa, wrapping you in a blanket and letting you sit around on a couch watching cartoons on a TV.  


Jaehyun heard his mother’s voice in the background again, getting clearer while the boy in a blue sweatshirt drifted away, shrinking into whiteness, snowflakes mixing into the edges of his silhouette. Jaehyun tried focusing on the boy's smile but soon enough the only thing he could make out was a pair of shiny ice-cold eyes. They twinkled at him one last time and got lost in the renewed out-of-control snow storm.  


“I didn’t even get to say thank you”, Jaehyun blinked, mumbling to himself.  


“But that were our neighbours, Jaehyun, we will properly thank them later, don’t worry, sweat cheeks! I’ll bake a cake for them, ok? For now we need to get to the hospital”, his mother huffed from the front seat, starting up the engine. “Such a blessing they noticed our headlights, I was getting scared we might get stuck in here for the whole night”.  


“Neighbours?” Jaehyun caught his mother’s forced smile in the rear view mirror.  


“Yes, baby. They helped us out”, her smile was quickly fading, giving way to worry. “Have you fallen asleep? You must be really burning up! Let me check”, she turned towards him, stretching out her hand. Jaehyun caught her palm with his own, stopping it from reaching his forehead.  


“I’m okay, mum, it’s not too bad”, he nodded, lightly caressing her fingers. Her palm was soft to the touch, warm, but a bit sweaty, with splashes of pink colour over white skin. Nothing there that could be associated with the ice. People’s hands should not be associated with the ice in the first place though. Anything alive is rarely compared to the ice. “I just didn't recognize them, that’s all.”  
His mother sighed and squeezed his hands in return.  


“Okay, all right. I’ll pretend you’ve convinced me. Driving to the hospital now”, and she turned away, leaving Jaehyun to stare out of the window. The engine obediently purred and the car started moving. His mother was humming happily to the sounds of the awakened radio. And what kind of magic was that? The same song came up again! This time a woman’s voice singing, asking in a velvety tone 'what are you doing on the New Year’s eve? Probably helping out mum to make a cake for the neighbors, Jaehyun thought to himself and closed his eyes.  


***

  


It was snowing very badly in Seoul, the weather slowing down the traffic in the city, but that didn't stop Jaehyun’s heart from beating excitedly, as if to compensate for the lost speed on the road. He desperately wanted to go for a walk in the city center, breathe in the freezing air and feel his lungs burn from it. He could almost see himself out there, diving into the most pleasant (in his opinion) smell of sweet potatoes cooked right before his own eyes or warming up his hands against a bag of baked chestnuts filled to the very top. He wouldn’t even mind the never-ending crowds of tourists gasping and pointing at piles of snow - he surely could relate to their excitement and would probably even land a hand if any of them asked to take a photo. Really, moments like this should be memorized and commemorated in every way possible, thought Jaehyun while looking out of the bus window over the snow-covered roofs. Everything was so white, and even the long fleet of cars on the road or the flickering of the traffic lights could hardly take away from the purity of the winter canvas. Jaehyun sighed. There was no time. They had a rehearsal today first thing in the morning and he needed to practice his part – a melodious vocal solo performed to a rich and fluid jazz tune.  


The thing is, Jaehyun fell in love one winter. With jazz. Now that he was studying vocals and spending his free evenings performing with a band in hideaway jazz bars he longed to get out to a bigger stage one day. Their teacher praised his technique and complimented the timbre of his voice, yet the previous solo was given to Jinhee and her mystical interpretation of the song. He couldn’t deny that goosebumps ran like a shock through his body when she weaved the words into the tune. That day, his teacher led him away from the chatting batch of vealy musicians and whispered using his softest voice:  


“You are like a vase, Jaehyun, but an empty vase. It is beautifully made but it lacks a purpose when it's standing there alone, with no flowers to showcase. There are tons of people who can sing well. Not many of them can fill their music with emotions though. Work on that”.  


Jaehyun always looked at any feedback or critique in a practical way: you hear it, analyze it and work to improve. He has been working like crazy, hurriedly brushing off any unwanted thoughts about his efforts being poorly navigated. He has never missed a practice before and he needed to attend today’s practice, too.  


Snowflakes were dancing in the wind, luring him out. Jaehyun would really rather skip the rehearsal. But he couldn’t.  


Yet he stepped outside, buried in an oversized parka and an old scarf his mother knitted him years ago as an experiment - she wanted to try out something new. It was too bright outside and his eyes started stinging and watering from all the light. Then again, his eye issues could be coming from a sty that was still not treated properly. He had that stupid tendency to get excited over the initial victories and forget about the bigger picture. So the moment his eye looked better, the sty about to diminish, he stopped using his eye drops. A battle won, but the war lost, he thought to himself and checked his backpack. No, no eye drops.  


Jaehyun sighed, the air leaving his mouth in white puffy clouds. He stood there for a minute, breathing in and out, admiring the winter view. It was a compromise – he got off the bus a bit earlier so he could walk to his university through the park. It was a small park with a romantic French name right by the campus. He was excited to get some chestnuts for his walk.  


The park was very calm and quiet, which was not surprising - people were too busy rushing to work or school, everyone running late today in this huge megapolis. Seoul was well known for its impressive urban planning decisions and high-tech environment, yet it still lost to something as simple and natural as the snow, even though white flakes stopped falling a couple of hours ago.  


Jaehyun walked alone, embracing the morning calmness. He saw a rabbit, its ears held high and its nose moving around, sniffing for food. It probably caught the smell of chestnuts from Jaehyun's pocket. Being in an exceptionally good mood, Jaehyun pulled out a couple of them. He slowly moved towards the rabbit, snow crunching under his feet, scaring the creature off. Jaehyun rushed after it, but the tip of his boot got caught in a maliciously covered tree root. He waved his arms around, trying not to fall, but his other foot slipped over a patch of ice, making the fall inevitable. Things were going too good for him, obviously.  


Jaehyun sighed yet again and turned to lie on his back staring at the sky. He definitely made a good choice of clothes today, the big old scarf and two hoods over his head probably being the only reason he has not hurt himself.  


Chestnuts flew out of his pocket during the fall and were now scattered on the ground. He could hear cautious steps of the rabbit, then more steps and then someone munching. He didn't care. He lied there, looking at the tree tops piercing the grey sky, seemingly not bothered by the icy coats on their branches. Each branch was stretching, trying to reach as high as heaven itself. This will never happen, of course, but Jaehyun could empathize with their longing. He allowed himself to be consumed by the nostalgic longing and bittersweet memories that this winter scenery brought to him, to get lost in them for the very first time since that winter many years ago. It was not the cold that burned his body - it was the passionate, hellish fire. He was burning from the inside because he remembered. That winter in Connecticut he brought a cake to his neighbors, his cheeks flushing brightly as he looked inside their house with doomed hope. He overcame his shyness to ask if they knew a boy with white, almost silver hair. He was a naïve child, yet a negative answer did not surprise him and he smiled at those kind people, determination still burning in his heart. He tried to catch another storm; he had freezed to the bones many times; he’d gotten himself terribly sick on multiple occasions, worrying his mother. That did not discourage him, and when spring came he promised himself to try again. But they moved back to Korea the following year and something inside him shifted. Maybe it was the change of cultural environment and the need to accept and follow the rules of his new society. Maybe it was the natural flow of time that lead him to grow up a bit. In the end he faced the reality. He stopped searching for the boy, only remembering him when his fevered mind brought him up in his dreams – that was all. He heard many times from practically everyone that he looked and sounded older and mature than other boys his age. There was some truth in that.  


Jaehyun hid the boy who believed in unexplainable miracles somewhere deep inside, never letting him out to be fooled by wayward imagination. It was not a big deal: he was not miserable, he wasn’t suffering. He was a smiley child, easily laughing teenager. He was not suffering.  


He wasn't, but maybe the little boy he kept locked was. That little dreamer was tearing his way out right now, burning Jaehyun's heart, reaching out. And Jaehyun raised his hand up, lifting the palm up to the sky. He held his breath in a silent question to heaven, to someone - anyone, no one in particular - to please let the magic he once experienced become real today. He lied there in the snow, waiting, looking up to the sky with childish hope in his eyes.  


The first snowflake touched his skin with utmost care and died on his palm right away. But Jaehyun knew the other snowflakes will follow shortly. He could see them falling slowly from the grey sky, almost invisible but still there. He saw them before he felt them landing on his skin, ready to grant his wish. He closed his eyes and smiled, lying there happily, enjoying the little miracles falling all over him. His back was already a bit wet, but that didn't matter. The magic was there - a simple spell, a centuries-old phenomenon, an act of nature. An occurrence that led to a conscious decision to believe.  


Several minutes later Jaehyun looked like he was covered with a crystalline blanket, his back feeling notably wet. Although it reminded him of the snow fights from his childhood, when dabs of ice were constantly hanging from his woolen mittens, it wouldn’t be cool if he got sick and missed any more rehearsals. Especially now that he was sure he could showcase the prettiest flowers in that damn vase.  


“Hey, mister… uhm… are you alive?”  


Jaehyun abruptly sat up and lifted his head, which apparently scared the figure that was trying to approach him from the side because it jumped and froze. It seemed like Jaehyun was so lost in his thoughts he didn't hear a person come his way, a boy with long skinny legs, a short denim jacket and a hood over his head.  


“Oh! You are alive, thank god. Are you okay? Have you broken something?” The boy bended towards him, as if trying to make sure Jaehyun was okay. The hood and his bowed position cast a shadow that hid the boy's face. Jaehyun only saw his eyes. They were too big, irises so wide they could probably hide a universe - was he wearing contacts?  


“I think I am. Is there blood on the snow?” asked Jaehyun carefully. He had not exactly come back to reality yet. The stranger looked behind him and shook his head, moving down to his haunches. “No, nothing. Are you really feeling okay? Were you just…uh, relaxing here?”  


“No, I fell down. Stumbled over the tree roots”, said Jaehyun, closing his eyes for a moment and pinching the bridge of his nose. He could swear he just saw a hint of something silver and white on this boy’s temple and he was now questioning if he really was fine. This boy definitely reminded him of the person from the past. The years had washed out his memories but there was this distant longing, a hint of recognition. It couldn’t be.  


“Are you sure? You look very pale, like a ghost.”  


“I’m sure, I’m feeling very alive and, unfortunately, very wet”, Jaehyun scrunched his face, wriggling in his clothes and hanging his tongue out in disgust. The stranger smiled at him with a wide open smile and mischievous eyes. Jaehyun knew that smile. The prettiest smile he had ever seen.  


“Let’s get you up then!” The boy offered him a hand. Jaehyun mindlessly took it and the boy dragged him up. The boy was skinnier than him, so pulling Jaehyun up took some effort, but he managed, the hood falling from his head, exposing the white with the blue tints hair.  


Jaehyun let the air leave his lungs and clasped the stranger’s hand tighter, drawing him nearer. The boy froze, startled. Jaehyun pulled the boy's hand closer to his eyes. It was a skinny hand with big joints, delicate, but not pearly white. He had that same hair, but his eyes were darker, opaque. Jaehyun inwardly laughed at himself, his smile breaking through in the corners of his mouth. He saw the boy relax and show a shy smile, too.  


Something played in his head. That same song. A memory that came with that smile.  


“What are you doing on the New Year’s eve”, he trailed off, shocked by his own voice.  


“Huh?” Jaehyun heard in response. Strange, why did the boy not pull his hand away yet. Jaehyun gathered all his courage because he knew what he needed to say.  


“New Year’s Eve. What are you doing on the New Year’s Eve?”  


The boy’s eyes jumped from one direction to another.  


“I… I don’t know yet, there are weeks before New Year still.” He tried to slowly draw his hand back, as if making sure he could, and continued as if speaking mostly to himself rather than to Jaehyun. “And when I think about it, I’m not sure I should even answer this question considering it’s coming from a total stranger who has been taking a rest in the snow just minutes ago”.  


“I said I stumbled and I slipped on ice!”  


“I’ve seen you catching snow flakes!”  


“Okay, resting in the snow it is. It doesn’t matter. Let’s leave the total stranger behind - my name is Jaehyun, I’m studying vocal music and my cousins say I’m their role model. And your name?” he spat out in one breath and shook the boy’s hand, catching it between his own two palms and not letting go until the boy unsurely said:  


“Taeyong”  


“Taeyong, nice to meet you. Thank you for saving me from getting sick” The boy shook his head and opened his mouth, but Jaehyun confidently put one hand over the boy's shoulder, making him stop. “Don’t deny it, you’ve done a good deed just now. It could have been dangerous, yet you came over here and helped me. I can’t thank you enough, but the least I could do is invite you to a concert held at my university. We hold an annual end-of-the-year concerts and they are quite entertaining! We also invite famous singers. You should come!”  


Taeyong looked flabbergasted for some minutes, but Jaehyun really lacked his usual patience and levelheadedness today, so he asked again. His hold on Taeyong’s hand became just a bit desperate. He felt like he wanted to hold on to this tiny hope that was building up in him again. He wanted to convey his feelings and all the revelations that happened to him today through mere touch.  


Jaehyun didn't know what Taeyong was thinking, but he saw the boy’s shoulders go down with the sigh as he was about to voice out his final decision.  


"I..."  


Jaehyun did not wait for the end of the sentence. He loosened his hold on Taeyong’s hand, letting it fall back to his side. He looked at the hand for a moment and then shifted his gaze to the boy's face. Dimples appeared on his cheeks. He hoped this was going to work.  


“Please. Come to my concert. You’ll make me very happy.” Those words came in a whisper.  


Jaehyun's heart sank slightly to his stomach. He felt as if he was hanging by the last thread, even though he was told by many that there was nothing that could trump his most successful weapon and no amount of self-control could win against his puppy-like hopeful gaze; yet he could feel his belief and determination fade away with every millisecond. Jaehyun scrunched his lips in defeat, when...  


"Okay", Jaehyun heard a sigh and he felt his face light up as he smiled.  


"Great!" he exclaimed. He knew that the okay he just heard was hardly a solid confirmation - Taeyong could change his mind in the future weeks, and he likely said it just to get Jaehyun off him. At the same time, Taeyong made an immediate impression of an honest person (partially because of those huge trusting eyes). Jaehuyn wanted to believe the boy would honour his words and treasure his promise. Fired up by those thoughts and suddenly finding the confidence he so desperately needed, he decided to secure the deal. "Give me your number!"  


Taeyong's face flustered in surprise again, and Jaehyun knew he needed to act fast and add more professionalism into the situation. "What? It’s the first thing you do when you make an acquaintance. Otherwise, how can I send you the address and directions? Come on, I’m not a psycho, I’m too handsome to be a serial killer," he added, smiling more widely. Sometimes you just had to sell yourself, he thought. He saw a hesitant agreement in the boy's eyes and pulled out his phone, exclaiming: "Okay, I’m ready, tell me the numbers!"  


***

  


Christmas eve came and went, but Jaehyun spent all his free time practicing - well, that, and eating delicious home-made food. He also exchanged quite a few messages with the new contact on his list. It turned out that Taeyong worked in the entertainment industry and had little time to spare, so they mostly talked via voice messages. But Jaehyun already knew that Taeyong lived with a friend, liked photography, often visited his parents and terribly missed his noona and his dog. He often joked he wasn't sure whom he was missing more. He also learned the little things from Taeyong's daily life. For instance, he knew that Taeyong tore up his favorite blue hoodie a couple of days ago, but his noona patched it up. Or that he gave away his finger protector to a colleague who broke a finger on the same day as Taeyong, just a year later. Jaehyun heard Taeyong’s nasal ‘I don’t even know why I’m answering you’, ‘okayokayokayokay’ and giggles (which he mistook for hiccups the first time he had heard it) on a daily basis. He was sure Taeyong would come on the 31st.  


But on the day of Jaehyun's performance he was not so sure anymore. He had not received any messages from Taeyong all day, but he kept the hope burning in his heart as he went on stage.  


The lighting changed, the brightness of the yellow lamps going down as the shades of darker colours sprinkled the room and brought the audience's attention to the stage. Jaehyun took his position in the center, nodding to his bandmates and winking at Jinhee, who gave him a thumbs up from the backstage. He then turned to the audience. He could hardly see anyone, by chance catching a glimpse of his father’s dimples in the second row. His heart was beating overexcitedly, speeding up his bloodflow, his hands shaky and sweaty. As the music started, the roaming lights blinding him for a second, he looked to the other side - and he saw them. A pair of captivating dark eyes, shining like all the stars in the universe. The lights stopped their chaotic movement, settling on the band members, and Jaehyun saw everything reflected in those dark eyes. They twinkled with greyish blue hues, shining like ice crystals from years ago, mischievousness and confidence pooling inside. They attacked him, chilling him all over, freezing him to the core – and then the warmth spread all over his body. A familiar feeling.  


Jaehyun smiled and started singing.

**Author's Note:**

> If you've read till the end I'm giving you a piece of my heart as a gift, please take care of it, dear friend.


End file.
